Reaching

Today I woke up again disturbed psychologically which dominoes into emotionally disturbed and down the line of floods of every negative thought or word that has ever been said to me. People who have said the most traumatic things to me and are so sincere and thoughtless in their approach…because if it were vindictive malice would be in their eyes. How I must learn to counter such arrows that at times pierce my soul-my heart. Is it really a blessing to be sensitive, intuitive, and expressive only to have my heart as it were on  a platter to be dissected at the whim of every human being that I encounter. Oh the days of living with a hard shell and barrier like a great fort denying access to all human beings. Like a caged bird or whale swimming in circles in my confined space with on-lookers unable to touch me at all or I them… only their penetrating stares and comments filling the air. Pointing fingers some full of wonder others full of criticism with a huge sign that says “Don’t Touch”.